Our Inner Wolves
by Kitthedog
Summary: A tale which follows the Marauders, starting with the fateful night of Remus Lupin. A story to show that most people aren't perfect.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Unless there are some very nice readers out there I'm not earning any profit from this fic. I'm not JK Rowling and I don't own Harry Potter.

Chapter One

All was quiet outside the Lupin residence on the evening of 1965's first full moon. The sun was spending its final few minutes in the sky and the birds had settled into their nests to await the morning hours. A loud crack interrupted the silence of nightfall and a disheveled man hurried inside the house, into the arms of his loving wife.

"Lyall Lupin, what time do you call this?" a short woman in around her thirties questioned.

"Where's Remus?" the man, Lyall, asked.

"In his room, where he always is" She said, confused. "Lyall, what's the matter? What's wrong with Remus?" She demanded, but as she finished Lyall ran up the stairs to his only son's bedroom. "Tell me what's going on right this minute Lyall - I swear I don't need magic to know something's up."

"Hope, it's alright. Everything's fine as long as we all stay inside. Just sit down and I can explain. It's all to do with my work. Today a man was brought in, for murdering some muggles." Lyall, ensuring his son was tucked safely into bed, paused under his wife's formidable glare, "He claimed he was just a tramp, never heard of magic, but I Knew. Nobody in the department believed me, but I knew that he was a werewolf. They let him go Hope and now he's coming after us".

Hope's icy glare took on a more thoughtful frown "Lyall, even if he is a _werewolf_ , why would he come after us? We've done nothing to him, it doesn't even know where we live." She looked at Lyall with a forced calmness, but he could see the thinly veiled worry in her eyes.

"I said some rather ill thought out words to my team in front of him. I was told he'd be obliviated, but he ran off before it could happen. As to where we live, well, I am rather well known in the wizarding world." He could not help but smile as he said this. "I'm sure it will be fine. Our house is well warded; I made sure of that before we moved in."

Hope followed him in to the kitchen, where she double locked the door while waiting for the kettle to boil.

"No use, only magic locks will protect us against it" Lyall said.

"Don't be preposterous. Surely it can't use magic as a wolf. It can't, can it?" Hope asked.

"Not magic but brute strength. Strong, dark creatures werewolves are." Lyall said and tapped the door a few times with his wand. "These spells mean that the door can only be opened from the inside even by nonmagical means. We just have to wait until the sun rises in the morning, then we'll be safe". He retreated into the front room and collapsed into his armchair. It was positioned in front of the fire he just conjured under the photo adorned mantelpiece, which he set his cup of tea on.

"Safe until the next full moon, you mean" Hope came as close to shouting as she dared, trying not to wake Remus up. She was infuriated by her husband's calmness. "How long will this go on, months? _Years?_ "

"It's not like that dear; this wolf, Greyback, he's a savage. He enjoys turning people into monsters, but more than all he enjoys the hunt. After one full moon he'll give up. It's no fun for him, waiting."

"Even so, he's still a threat. You work for the ministry; can't they do something to protect us? Even if it's just for tonight I'll feel a hell of a lot safer".

"The ministry doesn't work like that that darling. Besides, even if they did they wouldn't have the men to spare. Everything will be fine. You'll see."

"I suppose I'll have to. Oh Lyall, why do you always attract so much trouble?"

Lyall grinned at that "Remember our wedding, when your great aunt Eldritch overheard me comparing her to a wild Clabbert i saw while holidaying in America one year?"

"Of course I remember our wedding. And it didn't help that when she asked, you pointed out her pointy toothed grin."

"Honestly, how was I to know they were dentures? And the webbed hands were a dead giveaway too." He laughed, as Hope buried her head in his shoulder.

"It's late, are you coming to bed dear? I'm sure your thoroughly extensive wards will keep the wolf at bay." Hope said.

"Oh, I can't love. Go on without me. I better keep watch until the sun rises."

"Just in case?"

"Just in case." Lyall said before taking another sip of tea. He watched his wife climb the stairs to kiss their son on the forehead and go to sleep.

* * *

Remus Lupin awoke after someone shut the door to his bedroom. No light leaked in through his curtains. It was too dark to be morning, but Remus wasn't tired at all. What was it his mother had told him? "If you ever need to sleep but it just won't come, just count some sheep and you'll be dreaming in no time". His father thought the idea was ridiculous. "Muggles" his father had said, exasperated. "The things they come up with without magic. How can you fall asleep if you're out in a farm? Dreamless sleep potion for me any day". But Remus was nowhere near a farm and he didn't know where to get the sleep potion either, so he did what was to be expected of him - get out a torch and his favourite toys. After all, there is nothing more fun than a midnight play session!

Remus found his torch and tiptoed out to the landing, where he left his patched teddy bear. He grabbed the toy and was about to turn back around to his room when something out the window caught his eye. He looked down to the garden and saw a shadow that was a slightly deeper black than the rest at the far end. It seemed to be moving back and forth.

"Whiskers!" Remus exclaimed, before quickly covering his mouth. He waited a second to see if anyone heard him before rushing downstairs as quickly and as silently as he could.

Remus entered the front room and noticed his father asleep, cup of tea in hand. "He must have fallen asleep before unlocking the cat flap" Remus thought. He stepped even more carefully into the kitchen and undid the cat flap, opening it.

"Whiskers" Remus whispered loudly, "Whiskers!". "Stupid cat, never comes when you call it." Remus thought as he unbolted and unlatched the door. It creaked open and Remus took some tentative steps into his back garden. "Whiskers! Come here!" He said, whispers growing louder.

The blackness at the end of the garden swelled as the wind grew. The back door slammed shut and Lyall woke with a start, lukewarm tea spilling over his legs. He raced for the back door, desperate to make it in time. "Remus! Get back inside NOW!" Lyall shouted as he unlocked the door.

The door flew open but Lyall knew that he was too late. His sons' twisted body lay still on the grass. His blood mingling with the morning dew.

* * *

A/N: My first fanfic. Please review. I'll accept all criticisms, no matter how minor or petty. Thanks for reading.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Unless there are some very nice readers out there I'm not earning any profit from this fic. I'm not JK Rowling and I don't own Harry Potter.

Chapter Two

Peter Pettigrew stood in awe at the sight before him. A striking red steam engine stood on the track of platform nine and three quarters. Every now and then it blew out a puff of steam with a tinny "toot!". Peter, seemingly blind to the world, took a few steps forwards and collided with someone running down the platform.

"Sorry" Said the boy who ran in to him as he helped him up, "Didn't see you there".

Peter dusted himself off and noticed he'd grazed his forearm. He glanced at the boy.

He was taller than Peter and had messy black hair, which stuck up in all directions. His wire frame glasses were askew and he wore well-tailored school robes.

"Sorry, I was admiring the train. I've never seen anything like it. I knew my dad wasn't telling me something, I bet it's a 4-6-0!"

"Yeah, right" the boy said with a slightly confused look on his face. "Anyway, my name's James. Good to meet you but I've got to get back to my parents." And with that he ran out of sight.

Just then Peter's parents emerged from the barrier and made their way to him through the milling crowd. "What do you think Son? We've got some models just like this at home. How I'd love to ride on it again." Said his father, adoration in his eyes.

"You give those toys more attention than you do me!" A woman, who could only be Peter's mother, said. She was slightly rotund and had similar watery eyes and thin hair as the boy.

"They're not toys mum!" Peter exclaimed, but it was clearly a continuation of an old argument.

"Of course not dear. Now, you better hurry up. God forbid you miss the train".

At this comment, Peter's eyes widened. He quickly stepped onto the train, lugging his trunk behind him, only pausing to say a hurried "Bye mum, dad. I'll write soon". Mr. and Mrs. Pettigrew said their goodbyes' and waved at him as he took off to find a new compartment and start his first year at school.

* * *

James Potter, sitting alone in a train compartment, immediately regretted leaving his parents so early. He was about to get up and walk along the train when the compartment door opened and a boy with somewhat long hair and a rather dour expression on his face entered.

"Mind if I sit here?" He asked, shoved his case on the rack, and launched himself into a seat before James had a chance to answer. The boy had a certain way of standing and spoke in such a manner that James knew he must be from an old pure blood house. His grim face quickly developed a rather wide grin. "Away from the parents for a whole year! Do you know when this train leaves? The sooner the better I say" said the boy. "I'm Sirius, by the way", he added.

"Quite Serious", James said, the corners of a grin showing on his face too. "I'm James. That eager to get away from your family?" he asked, pleased to have someone to talk to.

"Believe me, the sooner the better. Besides, I've heard Hogwarts has got all manner of secret passages and hidden rooms to explore." As Sirius said this, the train jolted forwards.

"Yeah! You know it's got its own poltergeist too!" smiled James, "They say even Dumbledore can't get it out, but I bet he just finds it funny".

Sirius was about to add something when a small, red haired girl of about their age burst into the compartment. "Do you mind if I sit here?" The girl sniffled. "You see, most of the other compartments are full and I couldn't stay with…" The girl broke off with a sniffle.

James leapt up. "Yeah, you can stay in here. What's your name? Have you been crying? What happened?"

The girl sat down at the window opposite Sirius, who said "Don't mind the inquisition over there, I'm Sirius and that's James".

The girl looked up from the window before saying quietly "I'm Lily" and quickly returned her gaze.

James and Sirius exchanged glances before James, to Sirius's amusement, awkwardly sat back down. Soon enough, though, their conversation had returned to more important matters, like the Hogwarts feast.

* * *

Remus sat in his compartment with a grin on his face. This made his more ragged features a bit harder to see. Luckily He didn't have too many scars on his face - that would be hard to explain. He was dressed in plain robes and sat underneath a rugged suitcase labeled "R J Lupin"

He couldn't believe he was sat there on the Hogwarts express about to head off to study magic. His parents had all but told him it was impossible for him to have any formal education, as they hadn't wanted him to be disappointed when a letter didn't arrive. Truth enough a letter didn't arrive; Hogwarts' own headmaster did! Professor Dumbledore explained to him that, with special precautions, there was no reason why Remus couldn't attend Hogwarts with the other students. Remus would just have to be careful what he told them – not all people were as accepting as professor Dumbledore after all. In all truthfulness, Remus was terrified of what his peers would think if they found out.

"You looking forward to going to Hogwarts too?" the boy seated opposite him asked, successfully interpreting his grin.

"Yeah, I'm really looking forward to it. I'm Remus, by the way. Pleasure to meet you." Remus replied, sticking out his hand.

"Peter." the boy said as he grasped Remus's outstretched hand.

Both looked to the limp haired boy with a pointed nose and the rather small, red haired girl sat opposite who were quite deliberately not looking at one another.

"Oh, for goodness sakes." The limp haired boy exclaimed in a voice that could cut through steel. "I'm Severus Snape and that's Lilly Evans"

The girl elected to reply with a huff and a scathing look before they continued the argument that they were engaged in when they arrived at the compartment.

Remus looked at Peter with an eyebrow raised and Peter returned a half shrug. They decided to stay out of it. "None of our business" Remus said, "Let them sort it out between themselves".

Soon enough the girl, Lilly, leapt up, wiped a tear from her eye and stormed out of the compartment, slamming the door behind her. Severus looked first at Remus, then at Peter, then Remus again before sputtering something unintelligible and leaving the compartment himself.

"That was strange" said Peter, sighing in relief that the compartment was in a state of calm once more.

"Yeah, maybe they know each other. It's rather odd for two strangers to argue immediately after meeting" Remus said, he too relieved. "You'd think they would show us the courtesy of waiting until they were alone before having a shouting match".

"Or find their own compartment" Peter agreed before asking eagerly "What house do you think you'd be in? I really want to be in Gryffindor – that's where all the hero's go! Besides, I know I'm not smart enough to be in Ravenclaw and the other two houses sound equally dreadful."

Remus waited for Peter to stop before saying timidly "Oh, I don't know. I suppose haven't put much thought into it". Remus had, however, put a great deal of thought into the matter. It was obvious to him, at least, that he'd end up in Slytherin; where else would dark creatures like werewolves go?

"You'll do fine, I'm sure" Peter said, noticing the worried expression that took over Remus's face. "I bet you'll get into Ravenclaw" he pointed over at the upturned book that Remus was reading before he entered the compartment.

"This?" Remus asked, gently picking up the book. "It's just one of the basic school textbooks. I wanted to see what we'll be looking at in defense against the dark arts this year" he said as he inserted a book mark before placing it back on the seat, closed.

"Anything interesting?" Peter asked interested, leaning forward a she did so.

"Not really. Remus replied. "Some minor dark creatures and a few basic jinxes and counter curses".

"Have you learnt any?" Peter inquired. "You can try some on me if you want. Well, as long as you've learned how to undo them."

Remus's face turned grim once more. "No. I…I don't know how to do any. Do you think we're expected to? What if everyone else does?"

Peter's face also adopted a worried expression. "I don't think we need to. We're meant to be taught them by a professor, aren't we? Oh no, maybe this is what we're tested on to get into a house. My dad didn't tell me what the test will be. Maybe it's to see if we're really magic or not!"

"Tested?" Remus snapped. "We're going to have a test before any lessons? I haven't managed to do a single spell yet".

Peter got his wand out of his trunk and with worry taking over his voice said "Do you think we'll be able to learn any before we arrive?"

Remus, wand also out now, reopened the book he placed down moments ago and said "We have to. I'm sure the spells at the beginning are the easiest. We've still got a few hours before the train arrives" and with that, both were prepared to frantically spend the next few hours attempting to memorise incantations and obscure wand movements.

Remus was terrified. What if it was all for nothing? What if Professor Dumbledore went to all the trouble he did, expecting Remus to prepare, only for him to fail at the entrance exam? Remus could almost imagine the disappointed look in his father's eye's.

Luckily for them, before long Severus and Lilly returned to the compartment. They weren't speaking, but they weren't arguing either.

Lilly looked over at them and said "Ooh, are you trying to learn some spells? I've had a go at some and learned some incantations but I can't seem to get a grasp on any of them yet".

Remus looked up at her and said "You haven't learned any either? We think we're going to be tested when we get to the castle, to see what house we're going to be in, but if none of us know any spells…" he trailed off, Lilly's face now mirroring his own worried expression.

Before Lilly could say anything Severus let out a snort of laughter and sneered "We don't have to learn spells. We're sorted by a hat. The sorting hat. It decides what house we're going to be in by our memories or sub consciousness or something like that"

Lilly sighed in relief and said "That's good. We could learn some spells anyway, be ahead of the rest of the class!"

For Remus, however, this new information did anything but relieve – Remus' father was in Gryffindor but said it didn't matter what house Remus got in as long as he attended school. Remus knew that his father's fears would finally be confirmed when he was sorted into Slytherin. If he was sorted based on his memories then there was no doubt about it. After all, twelve times a year he turned into a literal monster. Surely there's nothing more Slytherin than that.

* * *

"Firs' years over 'ere" A large man bellowed at the end of the platform.

"That must be Hagrid" James said to Sirius. "My dad's told me all about him. He's a half giant and was expelled from Hogwarts under suspicious circumstances. Apparently only Dumbledore knows why"

"An expelled half giant?" Sirius exclaimed. "And were supposed to go with him, alone, up to the castle?"

"Do you really think Dumbledore would have hired him if he's dangerous?" James objected. "Besides, not all half giants are bad, that's what my dad says anyway. Think of it like this, not all Blacks are evil just like not all giants are evil."

"I suppose not." Sirius glowered at James, "But what makes you think I'm not evil? You've only known me a few hours." Sirius asked as they followed Hagrid to a group of boats on the edge of a lake.

James carefully got into the boat which Sirius had just entered before replying with a grin "I don't know mate. Call it the Potter intuition. I actually think it's impossible for a Potter to make friends with a bad guy". Severus and Lily approached the boat, no longer arguing. James nudged Sirius in the arm and waited for Lily to climb in the boat. When Severus attempted to step in, James rocked the boat quickly to the side. Severus teetered but couldn't regain his balance and, with his arms wind-milling around him, fell right into the lake.

The half giant, Hagrid, hurried over to the boat and said exasperated "Firs' time I've 'ad one fall in before the boats got movin'". He grasped the now soaking wet Severus by the back of his cloak and dragged him back to land. "'Ave me coat and get movin'. We should've left five minutes ago" he said before going off to his own boat.

Severus scrambled back into the boat and focused his scowl on both James and Sirius. The boat was suddenly propelled forwards with such force that he was almost knocked out again. Lilly also focused a rather icy glare on them both before turning to Severus, who promptly sneezed.

James and Sirius burst into laughter. "What's wrong Snivelus?" asked James "Got a bit of a sniffle?"

Sirius chimed in "Don't go snivelling for tissues around here!"

"Will you two just shut up" Lilly intervened. "What's he done to you?"

"Oh come on Lilly." James said "He's a prime example of the perfect Slytherin - Greasy hair"

"Hooked nose" Sirius chimed in.

"Pallid complexion"

"Viscous scowl"

"Stop it" Lilly screamed loud enough to attract the attention of nearby boats. "Just… We're almost at the school now. Just leave us alone".

James was about to add a further comment when Sirius jabbed him and pointed up to the castle. It was definitely a sight to behold. It was sprawled over a few hills and towers erupted from the different wings as if at random. The only sounds that came from most boats were those of awe. They sped even closer to the castle's grounds.

Before they knew it the boats had moored at the edge of the lake and Hagrid had led them up to the front door of the castle. Even with Hagrid standing in front of them they looked gigantic. Remus paused to wonder why the doors were built to be that big; surely giants weren't allowed at Hogwarts, giants face a similar level of persecution as werewolves and there would be no keeping the fact that you're a giant secret.

A tall, (but still nowhere near as tall as Hagrid) dark haired witch wearing dark green robes escorted them into the castle to another set of doors. The woman, who introduced herself as Professor McGonagall, explained to them that they would enter the great hall momentarily and face a test which determines your house.

The students were left outside the great hall and started chattering nervously.

James spotted Peter and said "You're the boy who I bumped into earlier! Are you alright now?"

Peter rubbed his arm, embarrassed "I'm fine. Did you get to your parents in time?"

James waved his hand and said "Yeah, way too early. I was sat by myself for at least ten minutes before Sirius joined me!"

Peter was about to reply when the professor came back to get them. She led them into the hall and set about preparing the 'test'. She placed a tattered looking hat on a three legged stool and stepped back in the direction of the staff table. Remus let his gaze follow and pass her to the table. His gaze was met by that of Professor Dumbledore, who raised his goblet slightly towards him.

Remus was startled out of his reverie by a rather unforeseen bought of song by the hat on the stall. A mouth had seemingly grown from the folds of the hat while Remus was distracted. Remus was still in a state of confusion when Professor McGonagall started reading out names.

Remus watched the sorting casually. The first to be called was an "Armstrong, Jake". He noticed "Black, Sirius" being sorted. This one took longer than the others, and Sirius's face cycled through a variety of expressions before the hat shouted "GRYFFINDOR!" and an extremely relieved look washed over Sirius's angular features.

Lilly was sorted into Gryffindor soon after. Remus thought he heard Severus groan somewhere behind him.

When "Laurence, Toby" was called up to the stool Remus knew it would soon be his turn. His stomach was churning as much as his thoughts. When Remus's name was called Peter nudged him to go up and whispered "Good Luck", Remus desperately thought that he needed it.

The walk towards the stall seemed to take longer than Remus expected. When he picked up the hat he noticed that his hands were shaking. He quickly placed it on top of his head and waited, ready to get it over with.

"First time I've had a werewolf sit under me," A sly voice came from inside the depths of his head.

Remus couldn't help but notice that everyone in the hall was staring at him. He briefly thought that everyone had heard the hats comment before realising that that was ridiculous.

"But I suppose the real mystery is where to put you." The hat said.

"Isn't it obvious?" Remus thought bitterly to the hat. "I'm a dark creature. I know I belong in Slytherin"

"I think it is quite obvious" the hat echoed, voice tinged with humour "That Slytherin is the last place that you belong. You're intelligent, that's for sure. You'd do very well in Ravenclaw, you'd even thrive in Hufflepuff. The thing is, you _belong_ in"

"GRYFFINDOR!"

Remus couldn't help but bare a great grin. He couldn't believe it – in fact he'd already resigned himself to being in Slytherin. His legs were still shaking when he arrived at the Gryffindor table. He sat himself down beside the Black who was sorted earlier.

"Congratulations. I'm Sirius Black" the boy said as he pat Remus on the back.

"Thanks" Remus said slightly exasperated, "I'm Remus. Nice to meet you", and his mouth spread into a grin once more.

Remus was still in a bit of a daze when Peter, and soon after a boy called James, joined them at the table. Everyone introduced themselves and they were soon in a mad rush to get food. He was thrilled; he never thought of it before but the prospect of having friends, actual friends, seemed all too possible. He barely noticed when the feast ended and they all headed up to their dorms to choose their beds.

It was only then when Remus realised his predicament; the others had already started changing into their pyjamas, but they'd surely notice all of his scars. Before they were done Remus grabbed his nightclothes and said "I'm going to brush my teeth" before going into the bathroom. He hurriedly dressed for bed and barely stuck his tooth brush in his mouth when the other boys turned up.

"Say, should we head down to breakfast together in the morning?" James called from around his tooth brush. The others nodded in response.

All of the boys promised that in the morning they'd wait for one another before heading off to breakfast, ready to start their first day of lessons together, as friends.

* * *

A/N: Reviews are more addictive than cocaine. Thanks for reading.


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